I love the holidays!! Families get together. Amazing food is shared! Connections and conversations are had. But sometimes things don't go according to plan. Feelings are hurt, unresolved issues resurface, grief seems unbearable, stress builds up. If you're a part of the VERY normal group of people that loves to celebrate all of the festivities but still struggle with stress or sadness during the holidays, then I think you'll enjoy this publication on dealing with all of the feels during the holidays.

There's so much to be grateful for this time of year: family, friends, beautiful experiences, community, our faith... the list is long, right? But what happens when stress, sadness, grief and hurts threaten to put a big ol' wintry cloud over holidays? What if I told you that you could recover more quickly from the disappointments and gloominess? That's why I'm sharing! Let's do this!

Let's dive right in and talk about two words that can make people shy away from those "crazy oil ladies" - frequency and vibration. These two weighty words have simple explanations...

Frequently Asked Questions

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• When you say "frequency" or "vibration" what exactly do you mean?  I'm talking about The Law of Vibration.  Modern medicine has only recently started to acknowledge this, but Albert Einstein proved the “Law of Vibration” It's a law of nature that states that ‘nothing rests; everything moves; every-thing vibrates.’ The lower the vibration, the slower the vibration; the higher the vibration the faster the vibration.
  
• Can you feel the vibration? Yes and No. If you've taken a chemistry class you probably remember learning about atoms and that everything is made up of atoms. These atoms are in a constant state of motion, and depending on the speed of these atoms, things appear as a solid, liquid, or gas. Sound is also a vibration and so are thoughts. So, we can feel (and see and smell) lots of things that are vibrating.

Here's what else we need to know: emotions absolutely have an effect on physical health and wellbeing.  Ever had a nervous stomach? Or a stress headache?  What about heart flutters when you've been reunited with someone you love?  These are perfect examples of what I'm talking about! Read a really fascinating article here: http://bit.ly/BodyandEmotions

Now, the difference between the manifestations of the physical, mental, emotional and spiritual simply come from different levels of vibrating energy, or frequencies. So, while the feelings of fear, grief, and despair vibrate at a very low frequency, the feelings of love, joy and gratitude vibrate much quicker and faster frequency. Wild, right?

Let's break it down even more and talk about cells.  As you know, we are made up of an insane amount of cells. Your cells, just like your brain, have a memory. You have the power to make the memories positive or negative, but that's another story!  Anyway, the nucleus, which lives inside the cell, is the "thinker." It tells the cell what to do (and it's where DNA is produced). According to Dr. Caroline Leaf, "research shows that DNA actually changes shape according to our thoughts. As you think those negative thoughts about the future - the week ahead, what a person might say or do, even in the absence of a concrete stimulus - that toxic thinking will change your brain wiring in a negative direction and throw your mind and body into stress." 

I don't know about you, but I don't know of anyone who hasn't experienced trauma of some kind. Trauma does not have to be something crazy intense! Whether it's divorce, natural disaster, loss of a loved one, an injury, or witnessing something that shook you, it's common for these things to resurface.  But why? Grab a drink because this is a longer read but so, so worth it to understand how we can conquer hurts. If you're a skimmer, look for the bold.

Facts About The Brain and Trauma 

• “The human brain is designed to sense, process, store, perceive, and act on information from the external and the internal environment. All of these complex systems and activities work together for one overarching purpose—survival” (Goldstein, 1995 cited in Perry, et al., 1995).
  
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• Neurons are the building blocks of the brain. During development, neurons create networks that link to create systems. These systems are how the brain regulates all functions. Brain functions are organized from the most simple to the most complex. The development of these functions is sequential, meaning prior events impact future development.
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• Neuroscientist Candace Pert stated, “Repressed traumas caused by overwhelming emotion can be stored in a body part, thereafter affecting our ability to feel that part or even move it.” We all experience trauma. Our experiences throughout our lifetime and the way we were each created shapes our perception of the traumatic event(s) and how our brain “codes” it.
  
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• When our system becomes so overwhelmed, our brain helps us out by compartmentalizing it/fragmenting/dissociating so that we can survive. Unfortunately, those memories can be “locked down” for decades and prohibit us from connecting in deeper and richer ways with those we are in a relationship with, even as adults. The primary emotions that tend to be “frozen” in our childhood that will keep us from developing healthy intimacy throughout our lives--if not properly sorted through and dealt with--are fear, pain and anger.
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• It is also being recognized that many illnesses stem from emotional stress and problems in infancy and even the womb. Over 90% of the neurotransmitters that are found in the brain also live in our gut (see Candace Pert in “Molecules of Emotion”).
  
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• Eastern medicines have long regarded the gut as the “second brain” and Western medicine is finally beginning to “catch up” and corroborate this, as well. Have you ever gone to the doctor for having a running nose only for them to tell you that it was “stress-induced” or that you have “too much” stress, which is, ultimately, making you sick? It’s a result of too much cortisol pumping through your system over a long period of time.
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• In short, it takes cortisol roughly 24 hours--once it enters your body--to be “flushed” out otherwise it continues to build and build over time, which usually results in feeling chaotic, overwhelmed, stressed and/or experiencing stress-induced sickness. Unless you’ve actively identified your feelings of stress and do something about it, cortisol is only going to keep being pumped into your system until it reaches saturation = sick and tired body. 
  

Stress is brutal and trauma has touched most of our lives.  Triggers can happen during the holidays when we feel like things should or could be "normal."  I really do understand. Things may not be what we hoped "normal" would look like, but through this publication, I am hoping that you discover some things that can help our brains and bodies!

Did you know that prolonged stress is also stored as trauma in the brain? Research: “Effect Trauma has on Neural Pathways” and you will find many medical journals (an infamous saying in the counseling world, “what fires together, wires together”)

Why this matters!   Exposure to prolonged stressful experiences has the potential to alter our brains, which may cause longer-term effects in areas such as:

• Attachment: Trouble with relationships, behaviors, boundaries, empathy, and social isolation

•  Physical Health: Illness and disease, yes.  But it also leads to impaired sensorimotor functions (think: when you're tired and your driving reaction times are slower), coordination problems, and again... increased medical problems.

•  Emotional Regulation: Difficulty identifying or labeling feelings, codependency and communicating needs

•  Dissociation: Altered states of awareness (wild ability to tune out/distract oneself), amnesia, fragmentation, impaired memory

•  Cognitive Ability: Problems with focus, learning, processing new information, language (ever experienced the struggle of finding the right word when you're stressed), planning/organizing, and orientation to time and space

•  Self-Concept: Lack of consistent sense of self, body image issues, low self-esteem, shame and guilt

• Behavioral Control: Difficulty controlling impulses, oppositional behavior, aggression, disrupted sleep and eating patterns, trauma re-enactment and addiction

“Negative experiences and ideas are recorded in our brains and locked into our memories throughout our lives. These memories range from mild to extreme and have a profound effect on our health and happiness.  In order to become who we are intended to be, we must erase these negative experiences and reprogram our thoughts to make positive ideas our reality.” D. Gary Young 

This could feel like a downer if we didn't have tools to help us navigate.  I'm a huge advocate of counseling, and there's a time an a place for modern medicine, but there are also some natural things we can do to support our minds, emotions and bodies! We don't have to allow trauma to sabotage and dictate our identities, beliefs, the ways we connect with others and so much more!  Below, I'm going to share about options we all have access to that can be helpful! 

Have you ever smelled a cookie baking and been transported back in time to a fond memory of baking with a loved one? What about those times when you've smelled glue or paints and thought back to your elementary school days when you loved art? There's an explanation for this...

Essential Oils Explained 

• Essential Oils are the liquids from the plants they are distilled from and contain very small molecules. They are different from fatty oils like coconut and olive oil, which have very large molecules.
  
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• Therapeutic Essential oils are taken by the bloodstream, and carried to every cell within the entire body, in a matter of minutes
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• They are powerful agents that are used for aromatherapy, personal care, household solutions, and support every system of your body.
  
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• All essential oils are not equal! A brain that is undergoing (or has undergone) stress and trauma, needs healing - not toxic synthetics that will burden an already distressed body.  Man-made scents attempt to imitate the natural fragrance of essential oils at a tiny fraction of the cost, which is the leading reason people choose them. Synthetic oil suppliers are able to reproduce a larger variety of smells and even create new scents that natural oils cannot. What does a Hawaiian breeze smell like exactly anyway?? Learn more about what sets Young Living apart at www.seedtoseal.com

  How Essential Oils Work on Emotions    

• Fragrance is the substance of memories. Research shows that when inhaling the pure constituents in these essential oils, it can stimulate the olfactory receptors and activate regions in the brain’s limbic system associated with memory, emotion, and state of mind. This is the brain’s center of emotion and memory as well as the “unconscious brain.” In less than a second, a scent has the power to activate a number of physical and emotional responses that, perhaps, you have long forgotten about or believed were not an issue anymore. Read more about the brain + smell here: http://bit.ly/2NJsiPe
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• Certain essential oils work by calming the central nervous system and helping us to relax instead of allowing the buildup of anxiousness in the body.  Ready to learn something wild? What is commonly labeled as “anxiety” has been shown to be incredibly acidic in the body. This hormonal response activates an enzyme which results in the anxiety being stored in our DNA.  Read about it here: http://bit.ly/32I063u Essential oils support the body in minimizing this reaction, and Young Living has a stellar product called Alkalime that helps keep the body balanced
  
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• Essential oils can also help in the release of old emotional traumas. In 1989, Dr Joseph Ledoux from NY Medical University discovered that the amygdala (in the limbic center of the brain) plays a role in the storage and release of emotional traumas. He also suggested that aromas could trigger an emotional release.
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• In addition, essential oils carry molecules known as sesquiterpenes, which are capable of penetrating the blood-brain barrier. These molecules have a significant oxygenating effect on the brain. The combination of oxygenation on the brain and the stimulation from aromatic molecules appears to assist the amygdala in facilitating the release of emotional blockages.
  
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• The amygdala is the “watchdog” of the brain. It is constantly looking to identify “friend” or “foe” in our environments. In other words, it is the baby gate of the mind. In a matter of seconds, we can be triggered into a fight/flight/freeze response and locked in the “downstairs brain” unable to access our “upstairs” or the executive (logic and reason) brain. If we stay locked down in the downstairs survival brain for too long, our brain WILL begin to rewire itself thus suppressing our emotions and ability to attach and connect to others.
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• The frequency and aroma of essential oils have an effect on human frequencies, the brain and our bodies.  You don't have to take my word for it... here's an amazing list of studies: http://bit.ly/33Omie0
  

Amazing, right?? Essential oils are a gift to help us rewire our brains, deal with emotions, and even conquer old thought patterns! 

We talked about how amazing essential oils are on the limbic system!  That little amygdala is wildly powerful!! Now,  we need to talk about the Feelings Kit. This kit has (6) essential oil blends that are amazing for emotional support! If the holidays are difficult, or you've gone through a super tough season, this post is worth your time.

A Few Things:

▪ The whole kit is outlined in a single post so you can see it all in one place.

▪ I give tips on how to use the oils but it also comes with instructions. I apply the oils in the order presented.

▪ There are (2) sets of affirmations.  One is for general use, and the second set is faith-based and what I have used with tremendous success. Use which ones you identify most with - or be inspired to create your own!

▪ The value of this kit is amazing! You get $227.47 worth of some PRECIOUS oils for just a little over $175!

Important Note: You, your mind and your emotions are worth the time and financial investment.  Applying the oils and saying affirmations takes about 15 minutes - again, you're worth making that time for.

VALOR 

 A powerful balancer and personal favorite! When I feel off, and don't know what to use, I reach for Valor.   It also gives us the courage to:

▪️ step onto the school bus for the first time.

▪️ get through our first presentation.

▪️ take the first step towards a goal

HOW TO USE: Topical: Apply 2-4 drops directly to left shoulder blade. Dilution not required, except for the most sensitive skin. Use as needed. Aromatic: Diffuse up to 1 hour 3 times daily.

POSSIBLE AFFIRMATIONS  

"I inhale courage and exhale fear."

"I am strong and of good courage.  The Lord my God goes with me." (Deut. 31:6)

RELEASE 

Release Essential Oil is a very effective blend for releasing negative memories that are stored on a cellular level. This oil is also very useful in releasing anger and other negative emotions.  

HOW TO USE: Apply 2-4 drops directly below your throat above your clavicle. Dilution not required, except for the most sensitive skin. Use as needed Diffuse 4-6 drops up to 1 hour 3 times daily.

POSSIBLE AFFIRMATIONS   

"I let go of the things that no longer serve me and choose to focus on the good things in my life."

"I throw off everything that hinders me and set my eyes on the goodness God has for me." (Heb. 12:1) 

FORGIVENESS 

Forgiveness is uplifting and releasing at the same time! It facilitates the release of hurtful memories and promotes a willingness to move forward.  

HOW TO USE: Use this blend topically or in a diffuser to help feel and process forgiveness. Apply 2-4 drops directly to your right rib cage or the center of your right foot. Dilution not required, except for the most sensitive skin. Use as needed. Diffuse 4-6 drops up to 1 hour 3 times daily.

POSSIBLE AFFIRMATIONS   

"Forgiveness is a gift to myself." 

"I am a new creation. The old has gone, the new is here.  I forgive as I have been forgiven." (2 Cor. 5:17) 

PRESENT TIME 

Present Time Essential Oil promotes feelings of living in the moment and opens up new possibilities!  

HOW TO USE: Topical: Apply 2-4 drops directly to the area two inches below belly button. Dilution not required, except for the most sensitive skin. Use as needed. Diffuse 4-6 drops up to 30 minutes 3 times daily.

POSSIBLE AFFIRMATIONS   

"I am fully focused and present in my interactions."  

"God is present with me, a strong warrior who saves me.  He calms me with his love and delights in me." (Zeph. 3:17) 

INNER CHILD 

Inner Child can help you access your creativity and your inner child. It can stimulate memory and connect you with your authentic self. It can also be very helpful for children who have had a troubled past or who are going through a difficult time emotionally.  

HOW TO USE: Dilute 1 drop with 1 drop of V-6™ or olive oil and apply to your earlobe as needed. Diffuse up to 1 hour 3 times daily.

POSSIBLE AFFIRMATIONS   

"My personality, gifts, strengths and life are a gift." 

"I am wonderfully made. I am free to be myself, experience joy, and have contentment as a child of God." Ps. 139: 14, 1 Jn 5:12

HARMONY

Harmony oil blend brings harmony to your body.  It is said to be one of the only essential oils that can create balance for your entire body. Harmony helps us to feel confident, and balances our nervous system’s reaction to stress.  

HOW TO USE: Diffuse 4-6 drops up to 1 hour three times daily. Harmony is perfect to diffuse to help keep the peace in your home. Diffuse around children playing to keep the atmosphere light and fun. Diffuse around your spouse to bring a sense of peace and harmony between the two of you. Apply 2-4 drops to your collarbone for inner harmony and repeat the suggested affirmation. Dilution not required, except for the most sensitive skin. Use as needed.

POSSIBLE AFFIRMATIONS   

"Harmony and joy surround me." 

"I choose love today, which binds everything together in perfect harmony." Col. 3:14 

Yay!  You made it this far!! This kit is worth its weight in gold and helps big time with renewing the mind, releasing false beliefs, and being able to move forward in life with a fresh perspective! 

If you have the Premium Starter Kit, you probably have these oils! Surprisingly, so many of them can be used to support our emotions.

FRANKINCENSE

7 reasons I love Frank!

• It dramatically changes my mood by chilling me out

• Helped me feel SUPER balanced postpartum

• It's fantastic for fine lines

• It soothes inflamed, red skin

• Helps me unwind at night and let go of worry

• Super powerful immune support  

• In many, many focus blends because it works!  

HOW TO USE

Topical: Apply 2-4 drops directly to wrists or down the front of the neck. Dilution not required, except for the most sensitive skin. Use as needed. Aromatic: Diffuse up to 1 hour 3 times daily.

LAVENDER

Lavender is the Swiss Army Knife of essential oils because of it's hundreds of uses, but here are a few of my faves:

• Diffuse on high-stress nights

• Put a few drops in epsom salts and soak my worries away

• Spray on my gym/yoga towel to feel a sense of grounding  

• Put a drop in my hands and breathe deep. Calm washes over me.  

HOW TO USE: Topical: Apply 2-4 drops directly to wrists or down the front of the neck. Dilution not required, except for the most sensitive skin. Use as needed. Aromatic: Diffuse up to 1 hour 3 times daily.

PEACE + CALMING

We can't forget about our kids this holiday season. Chances are, if we are stressed and overwhelmed, they are too! Here is why I love this blend...

• Nothing calms meltdowns faster!  10 drops of Peace & Calming in a roller with a carrier = tantrum tamer

• All of the tears from desires, expectation let-downs and travel.... plus add in hormones? Did you know kids have hormones too which can affect their emotions? You can layer a roller bottle of Peace & Calming with a roller bottle of 10 drops of EndoFlex for emotional AND hormonal support!

• Struggling with bedtime routine during the holiday festivities? We diffuse 3-4 drops at bedtime to help our son relax to sleep

HOW TO USE: Topical: Apply 2-4 drops diluted to wrists. Dilution advised. Use 2 drops of Peace + Calming in 1/8 teaspoon of carrier oil.  Avoid direct sunlight without SPF or clothing for 24 hours. Use as needed. Aromatic: Diffuse up to 1 hour 3 times daily.

STRESS AWAY

• Diaper Bag + Purse

• Backpack/Workbag

• Suitcase  

And in the car, on my nightstand, and on my desk!  

Seriously, Stress Away in all the bags! It does what the name says, smells like heaven (lime/vanilla goodness) and works in so many situations. Here are just a few reasons we adore this blend...  

• It's great for Type-A personalities who are tied to their routines and traditions  

• Traffic - I despise it!  Stress Away keeps me from road frustration (fine, rage - I really hate traffic)

• I'm a stay-at-home mama who is running a couple of businesses during the holidays. Need I say more? Seriously, though - if you struggle with your day-in-day-out tasks, you have to try Stress Away.  

HOW TO USE: Topical: Apply 2-4 drops directly to wrists or down the front of the neck. Dilution not required, except for the most sensitive skin. Use as needed. Aromatic: Diffuse up to 1 hour 3 times daily.

LEMON

A simple oil with a whole lot of amazing benefits!  You need Young Living's Lemon oil in your arsenal.  Yup, I was specific because there are A LOT of adulterated bottles of lemon out there.    

Here are my fave uses for Lemon just by diffusing it!

• Powerful mood booster

• Fatigue fighter (hello, bottle full of sunshine)

• My mama brain focuses better when Lemon oil is in my diffuser!  And... some people love to diffuse it at night if they struggle to stay asleep!

HOW TO USE: Topical: Apply 2-4 drops diluted to wrists. Dilution advised. Use 2 drops of lemon in 1/8 teaspoon of carrier oil.  Avoid direct sunlight without SPF or clothing for 24 hours. Use as needed. Aromatic: Diffuse up to 1 hour 3 times daily.

PEPPERMINT

Peppermint may not be the first oil that you think of when it comes to supporting emotions but check out these uses:

• Really, really uplifting

• Energizing

• Supports focus + clarity during times of trauma and stress

HOW TO USE: Topical: Apply 1-2 drops diluted to wrists and forehead. Dilution not required, except for the most sensitive skin. Use as needed. Aromatic: Diffuse up to 1 hour 3 times daily.

THIEVES

Another surprise! Thieves can be great to clear tough emotions and release triggers because of some powerful oils in this blend.  

• Cinnamon boosts mood and is a natural aphrodisiac

• Lemon (talked about above)

• Rosemary lifts the mood and brings relaxation  

• Eucalyptus helps with mental exhaustion

• Clove helps with feelings of being defeated and an inability to set boundaries.  

HOW TO USE: Topical: Apply 2-4 drops diluted to wrists. Dilution advised. Use 2 drops of Thieves in 1/8 teaspoon of carrier oil.  Use as needed. Aromatic: Diffuse up to 1 hour 3 times daily.